The One About Going on Dates

It's the end of September and I've been on more dates in the past five months than I've been on my entire life.When I first embarked on this dating journey, it wasn't a search for love, I just needed a little male attention. Here's my working knowledge, subject to change and updating:

1. Everyone has something to offer
I was so into my type of guy I never gave anyone else who didn't fit the mold a second look. There's more to people then just the stereotypical type box we think they are. You'll be surprised to find that the skater boy is a hardcore humanist as well and I've found that animé can just be a riveting topic for discussion as Dostoyevsky, it sounds like blasphemy but I swear it's not. Expand your horizons, give them a shot, you'll maybe not regret it.

2. Being good looking helps
I met the majority of my dates online, because I'm still working on my pick up lines to use at bars. The last dating site I joined, I literally put my nickname, sexual orientation, age and religion and I've had people declare their undying love for me, steer clear of those.  You don't have to try as hard initially when you look like you walked off a runway and into their dreams.

3. Brains and beauty aren't widely accepted.
Unfortunately when you have the brains to go with the beauty some men will think you're too intimidating. Some men want their women simple, pretty without an opinion. A crying shame.

4. Hook up culture is real
For those of you looking for more than just sexual gratification, you'll find your inbox full of with "hey sexy" messages from players who have nothing to say to you before asking for your number. Those are the easy ones. The sly dogs, are the smooth talking good looking ones who say all the right things but just want in your pants. You won't know what hit you till it's done. In the words of Carrie Underwood "you better run for your life"

5. Online dating is the in thing
No one talks about it, at least no one I know but it appears a lot of people are signed up for online dating site. What app are you on? Let me know in the comments, I'd like to play.

6. Take your time
It took me two weeks after my aunt signed up for me to join her and another week to add a profile picture. At  first I only spoke to people across oceans and on other continents, India, Germany. Then I got closer to home, South Africa, Cameroon and before you knew it, I was talking and meeting people in Windhoek.  Beware of the stranger danger rule and the Internet can be a hella scary place.

Also take your time committing, take all the time in the world.

7. Be Picky
You're not obliged to talk to every stranger on the Internet. If you don't like how they look, swipe left, if you don't like what they said, block and delete. For your enjoyment and peace of mind, don't be afraid to dismiss 10101001's on your screen.

8.  No first date is the same
After a while, first dates start to look the same. You meet, you chat, you wonder why? No love found here. But if you're honest, no first date is the same, use the similarities and differences to develop a template for the next one. And when you come into your own, you'll realise that you can pick activities instead of coffee dates i.e. if conversation was lagging via text already.  Use each date to learn something.

9. Be honest
Be honest with yourself, why are you really doing this? Be honest with the people you're seeing, if you don't want to see more of them, free them. You can only string someone on for so long, after three to four dates you'll either have that, what are we talk or signs of it coming up soon.

10. Plenty of fish in the cyber sea
If you thought you caught a good one and it turns out it was a bad fish, throw it back, there's plenty more fish where that came from.